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I discovered the method of Applying Love to solve problems during the one of the hardest periods of my life; I'd
undergone emergency surgery and discovered I had ovarian cancer. Then followed a hysterectomy which led to immediate, frequent and very uncomfortable hot flushes/flashes! During
the six months of chemotherapy after the operation, I discovered that as soon as I felt any strong emotion, it
triggered a hot flash. (At that time I was having one episode roughly every
hour anyway.) These added to the general misery and
physical discomfort of the treatments I was undergoing. Not only is chemotherapy very physically draining, but I was also opposed to it philosophically. For some reason I had a deep resistance to using poison as a cure for my ailing body! I'd had chronic fatigue for many years, during which I'd spent a small fortune on healing sessions, special devices for relaxation, expensive food supplements etc. It had been my full-time job to try and get better. And what was more disappointing was that previous to undergoing the surgery and discovering the cancer, I'd actually felt alot better. The last lot of juices and vitamins I'd taken had improved my energy levels significantly.
So I was very resistant and resentful of the chemotherapy. I felt I was undoing all the good I'd done in the past and betraying my body, which had been responding well. I found it increasingly difficult to voluntarily submit to the poisoning treatment every three
weeks. It took most of that time to recover at first, then it took longer and I found myself cancelling sessions and rescheduling them later and later. The entire experience was basically of being hurt, assaulted and made to feel worse than I'd ever felt before. I felt guilty for going to each session, but a failure as I had to cancel them due to my failing energy and physical weakness. I was a mass of resentment, anger and anxiety most of the time! Add to that guilt for submitting, along with guilt for not being grateful the health service were spending a fortune on my treatment, and you get the picture.
One day, torn between getting on the bus to the hospital and just giving up, I suddenly realised, standing on the pavement in the sun, how my suffering and emotional turmoil right then were completely my own doing. No=one was actually hurting me yet; I didn't feel sick, nothing was actually wrong. Yet I was at a critical point of stress through my inner conflict. It was suddenly crystal clear that my struggle was pointless at that moment. In one of those rare 'aha!' moments, I completely understood how I was making the entire
process unbearable by fighting with myself! I decided to stop. I resolved to keep calm, now, no matter what, until there was actually a reason to make a some decision. Immediately the stress disappeared. I had a sense I was actually starting to care for myself for the very first time.
I allowed myself to stay calm and make up my mind about getting on the bus when it actually came, not a moment before. I allowed myself to have all choices available to me. I could get on the bus, or not, as I decided in the moment the bus actually arrived. For the first time I can remember, I had power and choice. I wasn't being driven mad by impossible questions. I had somewhere calm to live - a place above all the turmoil. I trusted myself. From this higher vantage point I could see clearly for the first time the nature of my thoughts. Instead of just following them I watched them and experienced the effect they had on me, emotionally. And I was shocked at how consistenly negative and critical they were!
I found I was criticising everyone and everything, including myself. Since then I've learned the critical voice starts with ourselves and then gets turned outwards onto the rest of the world. As I observed and experienced the progress of my 'self-talk' I learned, with the help of my hot flushes, that my opions were the real source of most of my pain - that they were actually worse even than chemotherapy! They were always with me, whereas the chemotherapy was just a few days of discomfort and sickness - not pleasant, but it did wear off. My negative thoughts adn attitudes, however, were constantly objecting to and resisting just about everything that was happening to me. That resistance was the source of the tension I suffered. Extreme stress can be useful if it forces us to find an answer from within us!
As I saw my thoughts for the first time as an observer, they lost the power to control my experience; they weren't 'me' any more, just habits of reacting, or words I was used to hearing.
Over the days that followed, every time I
started to get upset about anything, I refused to allow any emotional energy to follow the initial thought. In order to do this I found it easier to immediately substitute the opposite, positive thought and attitude whenever I noticed myself feeling tense or stressed. Then I noticed something rather strange; every time I deliberately changed my thoughts from negative to positive, whatever it was that was upsetting me immediately changed! It either disappeared instantly, or the situations reversed, so that they were of benefit to me in some
way. It really was miraculous! I felt I'd suddenly stepped into an Alternate
Reality, or a parallel universe, where everything was fine, and I was always being taken
care of. Just by changing my thoughts and feelings about something, it changed to my benefit!
For instance, one of the things that really used to upset me was being ignored or overlooked at the hospital reception. It was always busy and a bit chaotic and I was always half-looking for a reason to walk out! One day I was starting to get annoyed no-one had taken any notice of me for a long time. I decided to stop feeling resentful and start appreciating the women working there, thinking of how difficult the job was and how well they were doing it. As soon as I relaxed, one of the women looked up, saw me and asked if I was being taken care of! she checked her computer and told me I was going to be seen very soon. Just what I needed to hear to soothe my anxiety!
A constant underlying anxiety - that I wouldn't be able to control my emotions - disappeared. I knew I did have a choice and I could choose to stay calm and happy, no matter what was going on. I also gained confidence in the process. I started to relax and feel in control.
I wanted fo find the best ways of counteracting the triggering negative thoughts that still cropped
up, out of habit. I found that doing something like appreciating was the best way to harness and control my emotional energy. Feeling the beginnings of some kind of anxiety or anger, it was easier to redirect the energy into doing something, rather than just trying to stop it. So I thought - what emotions are the opposite to anger, anxiety, resistance etc? I made a list. It seemed appreciation and acceptance were the two most useful. I used those. I developed a theory which has held true ever since; there are only ever two choices - two directions we can go. One is to get tense, contract,withdraw, and feel more separate or antagonisic; the other is to relax, move outwards - expand and feel connected to, or 'one with'.
Often simply doing 'nothing' when faced with my negative attitudes was enough. It's a good feeling, refusing to move and get upset when your mind is screaming at you! Refusing to go along with its dire interpretation of situations I'd have seen as
humiliating or hurtful, I got to know people better; and I learned how often I must have been mistaken in the past! I found major emotional knots being gently and swiftly unravelled.
I realised all the positive attitudes and emotions were related to each other; one led to another naturally, and they tended to lift my spirits in an ascending spiral of enjoyable thoughts and feelings. In the same way, all the negative attitudes and emotions were related, and one led to another, in a descending spiral. The common factor for each set of feelings was Love and Fear. So I developed my theory and the practice of Applying Love. As I practiced the Applying Love method and watched it solve problems without
any effort on my part, I came to the conclusion that Love must be the motivating creative
force in the Universe - the energy field that connects everything and everyone. I started to wonder 'what if Love is what fills
the 'emptiness' of space'? What if Love is the fabric of the universe - the stuff we're all
made of? I started to live as if this were the case, and have not found any reason to stop yet!
I now believe we can connect to this essence of Love from our current state of separation by consciously
choosing positive emotions, thoughts and attitudes. Love is the Truth spiritual seekers are
looking for, but often miss; Love is Reality, the Unifying field of energy that physicists
are looking for. Love contains dimensions of meaning, harmony, order, and permeates all matter. It unites us all, and makes sense of everything that's ever happened to us - if we want it to! It can heal our problems in the past, present and future. That's why a
decision to act 'as if' Love is true, no matter what it seems like, reveals this seemingly
solid, rational and real physical world responding in miraculous ways! From this perspective, anything 'not Love' is illusion. It's not real, therefore not worthy of our attention. By removing our attention from fear and the results of fear, we are creating our future in the image of the one true Reality; giving ourselves the chance to express and experience the highest and most satisfying intentions and ideas we have.
I believe unconditional Love is the highest and most complete feeling there is. It includes all, heals all, and fufills all. It makes sense to decide
to experience love in any way we can, all the time. The Applying Love method is the quickest and easiest way
I know to see Love working in our lives.
If you'd like to unleash the power of Love to solve your problems and transform your problems, you can take the Applying Love Email course. In five lessons, I take you through the process I discovered in easy stages; it could be the beginning of the greatest adventure you've ever had!
Links: Article - More on Water's Properties/Making the Energisers,
Article - 'The Miracle of Water'>Chalice Well, official site>
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